Showing posts with label kinesics. Show all posts
Showing posts with label kinesics. Show all posts

Monday, February 27, 2012

Buck Fuddy Tips

Here is something I wrote to another blogger who published this. She is a very funny blogger. I highly recommend reading her stuff. Snark Snatch is her name and I highly recommend her work she is very funny. Has a great satirical humor that really paints a different view of the online dating experience. It is a great peak into a sexually confident woman's mind.

Enjoy what I wrote to her, I expected her to add her own to it but instead she kept everything I wrote.

Victor’s Tips To Keep You Fucking Your Fuck Buddy
  • I didn’t come over to spend time with you or go to dinner. I came over to satisfy our primitive desires. Don’t throw on a movie unless you have no intention of watching it.
  •  We are not friends(friends with benefits are different), we are fuck buddies. This relationship exists for sex, don’t clog it up with a friendship or relationship, this only ends in feelings being hurt.
  • Don’t make sex more then it is. It is just sex and not a big deal. Fuck buddies require a certain amount of sexual maturity and confidence, always be sure to create these relationships with other people who can handle it.
  • This isn’t fuck and tell. This isn’t about some great story or telling your friends, this is our business keep it to ourselves.
  • Don’t call/text me while the sun is up, spend time with the sun up around folks you care about, not with me. Obviously not everyone works days but the point is this is all about sex, not spending time together. This is a sun down relationship, heels up relationship.
  • Warn me when you are gaining feelings, and communicate your thoughts.
  • Gain a code for sex with each fuck buddy. Everyone has their own little quirk. A woman I know use to send me an “I’m cold will you warm me up?”
  • You are not seeing anyone. You aren’t kind of in a relationship, you are just fucking. You are free to see whoever you want and they are too.
  • No more then 3 sessions a week, anymore and you are spending too much time together. If you want someone to fuck everyday find a relationship.
  • Always wear protection! I don’t care if they say they aren’t seeing anyone else. Protect yourself at all times, you aren’t in a relationship.
  • Define it as a fuck buddy relationship. Definition is very key in any relationship but it is especially true in fuck buddies. People can gain feelings but definition helps lay down the rules early on. If you don’t want a relationship and they do this isn’t going to be a good start. 
That is kind of the basic thought I take on with Fuck buddies. I avoid anything that can lead to a relationship, that means spending time together, staying over, eating together, going out, etc. I make sure that it is an arrangement defined and kept private. I let them know that it is a relationship that requires controlling your emotions, all about having good sex, and it requires sexual confidence and maturity.

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Initial Attraction Cues

This is going to be purely about initial attraction cues. Initial attraction cues tend to be small cluster following eye contact. A good basic example is: Eye contact, submissive  look down/away, and a preen of some sort. On to some real life examples.

Example 1: So a cute young white women was walking in the door to my work we made eye contact(1) and she gave me a slight smile(2) as I smiled at her. She than looked away and down in a submissive manner(3), this is something I am sure most of you miss or think is bad. This is regular in courtship, the women tend to submit as a form of shyness. Most of you men do this as well when you are intimidated by an attractive girl. She moved her hair behind her ear(preening to adjust her appearance for me, look at me(4)). Than she walked in my direction(5) as if to show herself off only to turn away only to turn and walk the opposite way. I was initially what she walked towards(she was attracted to me like a magnet), than she realized she came to my work for a different reason. We greeted each other and as she walked away she turned as if to look back and see me out of the corner of her eye. It is a slight head turn with her eyes moving to the side to look(6), she was looking to get another view of me without being caught. She sent me similar signals as she exited.

Example 2: This is more of gaining and attraction. I was called over to deal with a situation. I went to talk to a cute young women who was working at my work for a shift or two. I walked over smiled at her. She made eye contact and gave a courtesy smile(tight lip forced smile, you guys have all given them to an unlike acquaintance). I joked for a second and she did the head shake(a wiggle as if to shake her hair a form of preening(1)). She gave me strong eye contact with a true smile(2). She looked down submissively from behind the counter(3). We kept strong eye contact during the conversation(4). She went to move her hair behind her ear(5), she was adjusting her appearance and bringing attention to her face. She also turned her head slightly(6), this is a form of submission often missed. It grants neck exposure something very submissive through out the animal kingdom.

Example 3: I was sitting at a bar, I was on one corner and a very attractive Brazilian women was on another. I had a straight forward view while she had to turn and look to see me. There was one person in between us(her friend). I was chatting with some friends, this is a small bar capacity is like 80. I look over and seen she was staring at me(1). We have all caught someone doing this, often times we unfortunately dismiss it. She was a very confident women and it showed in her body language. She gave me a slight smile(2) as if to say yes I am attracted to you. Her head was pointing slightly down(3) she did not look away as we made eye contact(she couldn’t take her eyes off me(4)). She adjusted her jewelry slightly(a form of preening(5)).  She turned her head slightly when we initially made eye contact(6). Her arm was extended across the bar as if she was reaching to touch me(7). This was all within a couple of seconds. She was very confident in her body language. Her shoulders were out and she had the aura of a women who gets what she wants.

Example 4: I was sitting next to my friend a different time at the exact same bar as above. This time I was sitting next to him. I seen this cute local girl look his way(1). As she went to order a drink(she was standing to order a drink and we had seats at the bar) her torso was facing him(2). She seemed to be facing at a neutral angle but I realized that it was completely directed at him. She made strong eye contact with him(3) and smiled(open mouth and loose lips, it was obviously very genuine(4)). She looked down at the bar submissively when he looked over and noticed her(5). She pulled her shirt down(preening for him(6)) and bumped into him(7). She initiated conversation(8) with the regular “How are you tonight?” Than she rubbed her shoulder against him joking and flirting(9). I spotted all the initial signs before he even had an idea, before they flirted. She most definitely wanted him and wanted him that night.

Example 5: I was sitting at a table when I noticed a shy petite little women looking at one of the gentlemen at the table(1). It was very noticeable that she was shy as her shoulders were used to hide her neck. She was froze(2) an instinct that happens(predators look for movement, we freeze to not attract attention) as their fear of social interaction was published, when she got caught looking she looked down submissively(3). Because she was shy she didn’t give to much body language. She had a foot pointed at this gentlemen(4) showing he was the most interesting to her(look for this you guys, it happens all the time). When she did look to see him again she raised her eyes up to him while her head was still down(5), a very submissive look I am sure you guys have seen multiple little kids do this when they did something wrong.  When caught she always returned for a look at him(6).  This was as subtle as it gets, very hard to pick this one up unless you have the right knowledge.

Monday, February 13, 2012

Body Language Rules to Follow

ShowYourMind.com
This is a refresher, I don't know how many people know the basic rules to reading body language. It seems we have some different folks monitoring this blog then just the forum. So here are some of the rules to Reading Body Language with the most success.
1. Context, Always put body language in context. Someone maybe closed up (arms crossed), but it maybe due to the weather if it is very cold. They may have a dirty shirt and are hiding it. Make sure that you are putting their body language in context with the situation, weather, environment etc.
2. Clusters make up the whole message. Don't just look at one sign and draw a conclusion. Look at the body language as a whole. Always look for multiple signs. A smile, turned head, and leaning in torso is a nice cluster. A bobbly head, a full frontal torso, and a foot pointed towards you is another cluster as well.
3. Congruency, the body language must agree with it's self. Some times we politely smile at someone but we don't truly smile at them. Our body language is closed. Or sometimes we are saying we are happy with a angry look on our face. The body language has to have congruency.
4. Consistency, people are consistent and have certain habits in their body language. Look for consistency, somethings are going against their natural body language. Some girls always preen their hair, showing constant insecurity. So she may not be preening for you at all, she may be preening for her self esteem.
Always be aware that reading body language requires you to have a fluctuating understand of each situation with each particular person's body language. You need to be aware that each person has Consistent habits, Congruency with their message(when honest, body language always agrees), put all the signs in Context, and make sure there are Clusters of signs all leading you to the same conclusion.